Sometime over the next year, Netflix will launch their reboot of the 90’s sitcom Full House. Their version, Fuller House, will launch to appeal to the millennials who fondly remember their TGIF childhoods and their love for the original show. However, not everyone is excited about this reboot. Ben Collins (The Daily Beast) documented one man’s experience in watching every episode of Full House. His regards of the show compared it to something Satan would not have dreamed of, even with an unshakable flu.
Collins claims that this show reflects how the people of the United States are to the rest of the world. It portrays people who live their lives with only their own self interest.
Collins even defends the individuals who may have fond memories of the show, or even like it. They simply have not watched a full episode (from one of the eight seasons) recently.
Ryan Alexander-Tanner (that is his real name) has watched every single episode of Full House. He wrote a detailed report on each episode on his anonymous blog “Full House Reviewed.” Alexander-Tanner started this project in 2011 and finished in 2014, all despite his deep hatred for the show.
Initially, Alexander-Tanner had started the review about Full House as a way to stay busy between projects. The illustrator/graphic artist had just finished a book with Bill Ayers and was waiting for the next project to begin. He started the blog as a way to have a structured but “weird” and “frivolous” project. Alexander-Tanner’s reviews illustrate his genuine anger towards the writers of the show, while analyzing the Full House episode’s content to understand the mindset of the writers. His conclusion is that “Full House was and is everything that is wrong with America.”
Alexander-Tanner told The Daily Beast that he thinks “what is unsettling about [Full House] is how sort of confrontational and obnoxious it is.” He illustrates his point with a mention of the episode “Stephanie Plays the Field” in which a little league game stops in the middle of an at-bat so that Stephanie and DJ can have a heartwarming talk. “Whenever the family goes into public spaces, they make it about them,” Alexander-Tanner said, “This is a nightmare world for all other people.”
Alexander-Tanner believes that his blog gained in popularity because it opened people’s eyes towards the true terribleness of the show, Full House. He believes the rest of America will see it too in 2016. Alexander-Tanner further criticizes the show, saying “It started out as a failure of a show, they kept it going, then it became this inexplicable phenomenon. They must have made this decision very early that ‘We’re not going to try harder… [t]he only thing that really gets better is the lighting. It really changes after the first season.” He stated that the show had pastel colors that were pleasing but made viewers feel like they were inside of a McDonalds. He stated that that was appropriate because Full House was the “McDonald’s of sitcoms.” In his blog he also stated that the show was just a synthetic re-creation of a real TV show, that rots your insides.
Yet, Alexander-Tanner did come to one insightful conclusion about Full House, “I paid attention to the site’s demographics is that an awful lot of young girls watched the show…” He stated that Full House was about three girls with “three doting…father figures,” who tend to their every need. He stated that that was, “a pretty obvious little-girl fantasy.” This whole series of Full House was a testament to the self-praise that inspired the late 80’s and early 90’s. We are all wonderfully unique and perfect snowflakes. So much so, that no one else really matters. This message was trumpeted throughout every episode of Full House. It’s a message we will have to revisit in 2016, with the launch of Fuller House.
Opinion by Greg Johle
The Real Full House Reviewed